Come on and slam

[spaaaaaace]

It doesn't matter what was happening before. Wherever your character was? They just faceplanted into steel flooring. If they look around, it’s just a short narrow hallway, very characteristic of a transport vessel. Emergency lights flicker and faint, urgent beeping can be heard from the end, which opens up into a room that is currently producing a faint, blue glow.

A happy tone plays and is quickly followed by a chipper artificial voice:

Huh! How weird. I can’t believe we got another one! Well, welcome aboard the Ithaca. We’re having a bit of trouble with our warp drive right now. Please stand by.

Suddenly, the ship hits a bit of turbulence. Whoever’s in the hall may be thrown around bit, but luckily there aren’t too many sharp edges on the bulkhead. What are a few bumps and bruises anyway?

Oh, you may want to move. I think a new crew member is arriving.

Further questions are just met with an overly apologetic Please stand by! But turn their back for long enough? Another unlucky “crew member” may come catapulting into them. The artificial voice doesn’t seem too concerned with exploration, though. Every door is unlocked. The ship remains turbulent as it sometimes spits out unfortunate souls, but with steady feet, may find the following places of interest.

Navigation was where all that beeping was coming from. There’s a super fancy galaxy map that would certainly be a lot more interesting if actually contained planets your character knew. Sorry, there’s no Sol System or Federation Space here! In front of that is a cockpit which has a bunch of blinking consoles in front of a really comfortable looking pilot’s chair. It’s probably not wise to touch anything.

Head back to the crew quarters, and in between the rows of bunk beds, there are several lockers. Open them will reveal a myriad of (abandoned) personal items ranging from spare clothes to fit someone with six arms to a comic book collection to an alien “personal massager.” The stuff looks like it’s been left alone for at least a month. Maybe two.

If they head down a level, they might hit engineering or the cargo hold. Engineering has quite the array of tools, from the most basic to the most technologically advance. The most peculiar thing, though, is a meticulously organized collection of bright colored plastic tools. Across in the cargo hold, there are several wooden crates along with a few tamper proof containers. Most of the crates are all labeled with the same name, for someone on planet “Gotor.” A clever character might recognize this as a planet that the Ithaca is happily speeding towards right now according to the map in navigation. Most of the boxes contain bowler hats. The remaining to apparently be dropped off at Gotor contain bowling balls.

((GO FORTH AND BE IN SPACE! Have a massive pile up in the hall or bump into each other in engineering or explore together! It doesn’t matter. Feel free to have them encounter other strange things not written about here. Make the Ithaca spit out an unfriendly alien that they have to hit with a shovel. Make as many subthreads as your hearts desire. Really, do whatever. After a while, the turbulence will settle down and Edgar will explain. ))

Comments

[spaaaaaace]

So, suddenly, there’s this really annoying beeping sound. Like ridiculously so. The unhelpful AI from before remains unhelpful and offers no advice of how to proceed in the light of these beeping noises and– oh look –there’s flashing red lights too. They seem to light up in a pattern, cascading towards navigation in the off chance that everyone got lost or didn’t remember where they came from. Should someone chose to ignore cascading lights an awful, terrible noise sounds a few times until they turn around and go forward as directed. There are boxes upon boxers of bowler hats and bowling balls that need delivery! And what kind of delivery vessel would this be without a good collection of delivery men, women, and aliens.

The incessant beeping doesn’t lighten up until everyone has gathered in navigation (Edgar is very patient for a stupid AI). It’s now that everyone can start to get a good look at everyone else.

Phew! A mostly human crew. I pulled a few Giraffitarians before you, but they had problems with the door height. Edgar chirps happily as they assemble. It’s true, too, mostly everyone at least looks human, save for maybe some vaguely humanoid armored figures and a very clearly out there green man with a double set of eyes. Said green man scoffs. Primitives.

Edgar does not let alien scoffing throw him off and he cheerfully continues as if he didn’t hear it, Good to see all of you made it in one piece! We’ve had some splicing issues in the past. I’d advise you to count your fingers and toes tonight. Humans have twelve of each of those right? My entry on human biology was corrupted slightly on one of those warp jumps.

Comforting. What else did he manage to lose?

Don’t worry! I’ve got my warp drive mostly under control.

Key word: mostly.

I was attempting to return for maintenance, but now that I’ve drafted a crew, we can continue onto Gotor! As the new operatives of this independent transport and shipping unit designated as the Ithaca, you should begin to review standard operating procedure manuals. Our delivery will be a bit late, but I’m sure the boss won’t dock your pay too much.

Pay? Boss? What?

I’m– Suddenly, the AIs voice scrambles and music starts playing. It only lasts a few seconds, and soon enough the AI is continuing, relentlessly chipper, as if nothing happened, –Edgar, by the way.

They’re delivery people. They’re delivery people on a broken ship.

[spartan051]

[When the klaxon went off, his first instinct was to activate the active camouflage and find a way off the ship in case something critical like a hull breach happened. The almost sub-sonic thrum through the hull and plates told Kurt they were on a space ship but little else about this odd situation made a whole lot of sense.

How they'd gotten here was a pressing question to be sure. He shot a curious look over at his fellow Spartan and that look conveyed a whole host of questions as to whether or not they should follow the warning lights or if they were being herded somewhere. And if that was the case whether or not they should go meekly like lambs to the slaughter or go the opposite way.

Eventually however, the two Spartans and the canine soul-dog found themselves in the nav area with the gathering of mostly human captives.]

You people cannot be serious. You kidnapped us and now you expect us to work for you?

[spaaaaaace]

Oh no, nothing like that! Edgar continues with extreme sincerity. Malice and sarcasm are missing entirely from his vocalizations. Instead he is very apologetic. The warp drives aren't precise. I didn't mean to get a new crew. I quite liked the old one!

So naturally the next question is well where is the old one if you like it so much but he's not too keen on answering that. Here, have some more unhelpful explanation instead.

You're quite free to go when we arrive on Gotor. Or I can open the airlock if you prefer.

He's not even joking. To Edgar, this is a valid option and he means it with no harm.

[dust_and_echoes]

The Chief wasn't especially enthusiastic about the klaxons, or being led somewhere, but ultimately it was a sign of life. He's also armed, and not alone. There aren't a lot of things two Spartans can't improvise an answer for.

Even now that they're apparently not being shot at, he's not standing at ease and Arachidamia's fur hasn't lain flat across her neck and shoulders. Her ears still hurt and that's not cool.

The mention of the airlock draws the Chief's first comment.

"Don't do that!"

...In stereo.

Thanks, soul dog.

[surroundedbyprimatives]

Still haven't mastered free-floating in space even with advanced armor. Tch. Typical humans. Javik doesn't need to ask about the previous crew, because he can already sense what's happened to them (and he doesn't quite like it). He doesn't share that bit of information, though. Mostly because he's just kind of an asshole.

"I do not have great hopes that we'll end up any different from your previous crews, AI."

[spaaaaaace]

Well, not with that attitude!

[arespectablesoldier]

"I'm gonna go with the "free to leave" thing, because honestly? I'm not real big on the whole work thing," says Grif helpfully.

"...Where the hell is Gotor supposed to be, anyway? ...And about how much do you think fare would be to Vegas Quadrant?"

Anybody? Anybody?

[spartan051]

Silently, Kurt drifted over to the nearest control panel and tried to access the interface. All Spartans had been trained to access computer systems so as to complete their missions and bypass enemy surveillance and Kurt had always had a deft touch with machines. Despite the fact that he was a hulking near seven feet tall super soldier, he was also really good at fading into the background.

Don't mind him, he's just going to try and find a way of bypassing Edgar.

[spaaaaaace]

Sorry, Kurt, but there will not be much success bypassing Edgar. For how dumb of an AI he may seem to be, his programming is pretty tightly protected. Plus, if Edgar wasn't annoying enough to talk to, his interface somehow exceeds that. The console keeps switching languages, activating the screensaver, flashing different colors, and an annoying animation pops up periodically.

Oh, I suggest that you don't try to modify the computer's programming. The company has IT personnel for that. You wouldn't want to accidentally shut off life support when poking around!

Spoken like an AI that's watched it happen.

[raiderp]

If there was one thing Raiden was good at at this point in his career, it was following orders from crazy AIs... but that didn't mean he was going to be too thrilled about it. Especially not with chipper not-threats about being thrown out airlocks or having life support cut off.

"What do they even want delivered? There's nothing but bowler hats around here."

By now he had found his skull suit, so there was sure to be no more sensor-hats in action.